Journalizing

I think that my love of potential - the feeling of something being able to happen, teetering on the precipice of being and not being - is a direct connection to my love of imagination, sometimes more than reality.
The idea that something 'could be' tends to make me happier than the thing happening itself. Kind of like anticipation being greater than the show, but more like the 'idea' of a thing (be it a story, or activity, or painting) is sometimes better than the executed product. Not always of course.
This in turn (the love of 'could be' but not is) could be linked to a fear of failure (failing at execution of said idea). And a fear of commitment for that matter (not necessarily in cliched relationship usage). Making a choice, acting out towards a goal, is, to me, an act or form of dominance and permanence - two things that im not perfectly comfortable with.
This may, however, might simply be saying that I'm just not comfortable in a role of confidence.